The Suki Kamasutri: Queen of the Galactic Frontier

Eddie Takosori

# # # Season 1 # # #

# # # Episode 1 # # #

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    There are no traps.
    Mister be in the big trouble if he be the lying.
    I understand. But I’m not.
    The Mister sure?
    Yes! Come on, now. Open the door, already. Take what you want. And then, we can both leave. If I’m lucky, I can get back before Third Gong.
    OK. Here the Suki go.
    And there it is.
    Oh... Oh... Oh.   This, this make the Suki the sad, the very, the very the sad. The Suki have the such high the hopes. And the Mister... does the Mister know how many spaceship doors the Suki try to the open over the years? But they all be the locked and the closed to the Suki. And then, the one day, the Suki finally pick the lock. Well, really the Mister just leave his door the wide the open like the invitation, like he have the no the common sense the whatsoever, but the Suki like to think that she pick the lock, and so, that what she say. And then, she sneak the in. But instead of finding the piles of the platinum, the heaps of the gold, and the, and the...
    Ice cream?
    Yeah, the Captain Comet’s Cosmic Ice Cream Cones, good to the very last lick. But the Suki no find the none of the that. The Mister, he no have no ice cream, he no have no gold, he no have no furs, no jewels, he no even have no big screen Ethernet connection with the surround sound and full immersion chamber, and really, everyone the have that, the now. But no, not the Mister. The Mister, he be the true blue Bandi’ Brother. He just got the beans and the rice and the little dried flowers for the special occasion. They not even the freshly picked flowers for the special occasion that the Brother’s put in Suki’s gruel on her birthday. And it not like the flowers even taste that the good, so it really no the treat in the first place, but the Suki, she eat them the anyway, because she be the hungry, and it be the change from the same old same old, and the Brothers seem the oh, so the pleased to be able to give her the flowers in the first place.
    I’m sorry. If I had something to give you, I would.
    Ah, but the Mister be in the possession of the something the Suki, she most definitely decidedly she want.
    And what’s that, may I ask?
  The Mister, he could hold the Suki like he did before...
    As I explained, that was an accident. I’m sorry, but that’s not going to happen ever again.
    Then the Suki guess there be the nothing left here for the Suki, the nothing in the room, the nothing in the ship, the nothing in the entire the galaxy, there be the nothing nowhere for the Suki. It be just the way it the be. The universe be the cold, the dark, the cruel the place. The Suki she think she finally get her chance, she think she finally see the light. But all she get be the same old same old. All she get be the beans, the rice, and the crazy stupid monk with the crazy stupid name and the same crazy stupid ideas as all the rest. It the sad, Mister. It really be the sad. It be the sad enough to make the Suki cry. ‘Sniff. Sniff...’ A-hem! The Suki saying, she be the sad, here, Mister. She saying, ‘Sniff. Sniff. Sniff.’
    Um...
    Why the Mister backing the ‘way? The Suki go, ‘Sniff. Sniff. Sniff.’ The Suki being the unclear? The Suki be in the pain the here, Mister! She need the comforting. She need the compassion. She need to be held by the Mister in his big strong arms, till the pain go the ‘way.
    I don’t think...
    Listen, the Mister! The Suki, she cry and she cry! She go, ‘Sniff! Sniff! Sniff!’ It be the very sad! And what the Mister the do? He back the ‘way like the Suki be the contagion! Like the Suki be the zombie death plague carrier! This be the touching moment, Mister! This be the touching scene! The Suki get the award for her performance someday. But the Mister, he seen it all, he done it all. The Mister, he got the heart of the stone-dead dark star snuffed out centuries ago. The Mister, he no care. He just back away slowly, hope he no catch the infection from the Suki as he say ‘The um. The um. The um. The Mister no think.’ And that be the big problem with the Mister. He no never think. Only if he be the thinking ‘bout himself, then he be the thinking, what he can get for the     Mister.
    Look, I’m sorry.
    No! Don’t be touching the Suki, the now! She the fine! The Suki the fine! She no need no more help from the no one, least of all the Stupid Dumb Mister! The Mister done enough for the Suki already! Done enough to the Suki! He promise her candy. He promise her sweets. Then he all grabby-grabby-grabby!
    Look, I...
    Yeah. The Suki, she know about the Mister and his ‘The I! The I! The I!’ It all the Mister say. ‘The I! The I! The I!’ It all ‘bout the Mister. It what the Mister be all the ‘bout. He only look for what he can get! What he want! And then when it over, when he done, when he had his fun, play his little joke on the poor defenseless Suki and finished with his grabby-grabby-grabby, it be the bye-bye to the Suki! Sayonara, Suki Baby! Well, the Suki no stand for the it! The Suki no lay down like other girls the Mister maybe he know before! The Suki make the Mister pay for... Oh... Oh, the hey, Brother Billy. Um, the how long the Brother Billy be the standing there, the anyway? What exactly he see, the Suki, she the wonder? Cause there be the absolutely the no reason for the Big Brother Billie to frown at the Suki like that. The Suki sure she can the explain. It just help the Suki first if she maybe knew the little more ‘bout what the Brother Billie think he see, so the Suki can explain to the Brother Billy what actually he see, if the Brother Billie see what the Suki, she mean? So, what did the Brother Billie think he see?

Thus ends the First Episode of The Suki Kamasutri: Queen of the Galactic Frontier
First Two Seasons at Eight Episodes Each
Transcribes to roughly 108,000 words

Pure fluff, of course. But delightful fluff.
And yes, after throwing it away, getting another, taking it off, replacing it, and misplacing it, the Suki Kamasutri does finally find a dress worthy of her name.

Word is Seasons Three & Four have to do with her acquiring a pair of shoes and convincing Tug to take her dancing; but then, that's just a rumor. Eddie says he's not going to forward anymore drafts to me until I actually sell something, which kind of sucks, as I'm not much of a salesman, and I like his work, so anything you can do to help me get this stuff published would be greatly appreciated. And then, both of us can see how the saga unfolds...

Unfortunately, Eddie Takosori died on March 18th, 2014.
But hey, look on the bright side. His loss is your gain. All of his works are now (or soon will be) available online, free for the viewing.

The Suki Kamasutri: Queen of the Galactic Frontier - the complete manuscript in doc format

The Suki Kamasutri: Queen of the Galactic Frontier - the complete manuscript in pdf formart

I've even found a rough draft precursor to this masterpiece (different words, different plot, might as well be a different version of reality, written back in 2009, I believe, four years before the above), which now that I've edited one final time (if you want to call what I do editing) is available here for your reading pleasure:

Tug - Suki Kamasutri: All She Do is Talk Talk - the complete manuscript in doc format

Tug - Suki Kamasutri: All She Do is Talk Talk - the complete manuscript in pdf format

And lucky you, here's a short story sequel that I wrote, as Eddie might have.

Suki Kamasutri in The Boom Boom Girl (pdf version)
Suki Kamasutri in The Boom Boom Girl (doc version)

While the rest of Eddie Takosori's creative work may now be found at www.paufler.net/takosori

Let this be a lesson to you. Don't let me be your agent. Don't give me power of attorney. But if you want me to post your life's work to the Internet for all to enjoy, this I can do.

So, the sorry.
No more the Suki, for the now.
How about some other stuff?